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The Rawtenstall Annual Fair

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Down behind the gasworks, down in Rawtenstall,
That's a little town in Lancashire.
Last Saturday night, me and the lads,
Ee by gum we had some reet good cheer.
There was ice creams, switch backs, soda pops, and waxworks,
Figure eights and roundabouts,
We all paid a tanner, and we went in,
And weren't we all delighted when we heard the showman shout:

  1. "Oh, roll up, roll up, come and see the fat girl,
    Half a ton of loveliness and every bit her own."
    Ee, she were a big 'un, with accent on the big,
    And all the men with walking sticks went giving her a dig.
    Oh, she was classy, talk about a chassis,
    So blown up with air I do declare.
    Everything were champion, until some silly clown,
    Stabbed her with a pin‹said the showman with a frown
    "All hands to the pumps lads, my vessel's going down."
    At the Rawtenstall Annual Fair.
  2. "Oh, r oll up, roll up, see the House of Mysteries,
    Ladies, pay a tanner to be tickled in the dark."
    In went the lads, just to take a peep,
    The showman pulled a lever and they landed in a heap.
    Oh, down he shot 'em, straight to the bottom,
    Frills and bows was everywhere to see.
    There weas shouting, screaming, everything was rife,
    I saw some funny things I've never seen in all my life,
    I saw some funny things I've never seen upon the wife,
    At the Rawtenstall Annual Fair.
  3. "Oh, roll up, roll up, come and see the mermaid,
    See the lovely lady, half a woman, half a fish."
    In went the lads, to see it were no swank,
    And little Tommy Higgins put some whisky in the tank.
    Oh, she got frisky, swimming in the whisky,
    And when she come up for air,
    She bowed to the audience, gave her tail a swish,
    Her tail it came off and she really looked delish,
    She said "What do you fancy lads, a bit of meat, or fish?"
    At the Rawtenstall Annual Fair.
  4. "Oh, roll up, roll up, see the tattoed lady,
    See the lovely lady with the pictures on her skin."
    In went the lads and they began to cheer,
    For tattooed on her skin was all the towns of Lancashire.
    There was Adstall Bottom, Manchester City,
    The town hall was standing in the square.
    There was Oldham, Bolton, Ashton-under-Lyne,
    Coal pit up at Bardsley was looking mighty fine,
    When someone shouted, "Daddy, don't go down the mine!"
    At the Rawtenstall Annual Fair.